Walking Without the Soundtrack
Music from wake to sleep, perfectly curated playlists, constant audio input. Little did I know that I was numbing my awareness.
Yesterday during a nap, I had a random thought (reveries):
"I should do my sunrise walks without my phone and music. Just with a pocket diary and pen to save the ideas."
I'm not sure why (divine intervention lol?) - maybe it was guided by my 'no input before output' policy (I am struggling to fully follow this but slowly I am getting there).
And today I left home for my park walk as usual twenty minutes before sunrise but without phone, feeling sleepy and indifferent. As I walked to the park, my inner voice began rising up, and I started having a conversation with myself - the same voice over the years I've been masking a lot with music or distractions.
At the park, I did my space-time bridging session on a bench (I started this practice 3 days back). Today without a phone and watch, I wasn't rushed by time. I was fully present for the first time in these three sessions, and after the session I spontaneously did a 200-meter jog and felt each step connecting to the ground. My recovering right foot from a recent fracture felt different from my left. I noticed my breathing, regulated it, became aware of every step.
Walking home, I felt air touching my skin, noticed crows in roadside puddles. And... the voice came back and my mind turned to the familiar doubts: For the last few days I'd been stuck in loops - confusion about life in general and writing (why to write, what to write, who to write for).
Am I writing here because I WANT to say something, or because I HAVE to? I hate writing just to impress. I wondered if writers I admire like Tyler Joseph or Maggie Appleton face these same doubts when exploring topics they care about. For me, it's a kind of question that turns into avoidance and inaction.
But today, this question/confusion felt approachable rather than paralysing.
This morning showed me something simple: I don't need off-grid hiking trips to disconnect. A phone-free walk to nearest favorite park before sunrise is enough.
I felt 10x more alert & aware (dramatic effect, but it's a genuinely drastic change I noticed). The confusion didn't disappear, but the noise blocking my sense of direction did - like clearing static from a radio signal.
I was the type who listened to music from wake to sleep - there was a time I even slept with it on, a 24/7 soundtrack. Over the past year I've been embracing silence more, but walking was still always with audio.
I love how this simple activity of walking is evolving for me, and I'm looking forward to more of these walks. The rainy season here is perfect: dark clouds rolling across deep blue sky, cool air, navigating puddles like Takeshi's Castle. hah.
Live a little raw and go on a walk without your phone.
You might uncover the awareness you've been carrying all along.
Supporting research study - https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-023-36256-4
numb → alert → aware